Hello, My name is Chelsea and I am Human AF.

Good, now that we’ve got that over with, it’s time for me to be super real and open with you all.

Travel is awesome, and my travel blog may make my life look perfect to some and unattainable to others “oh she’s so lucky that she’s able to do all of this”. But I want to be real, and show that I’m a human too.

The purpose of this post is essentially about how you’ve got to do the INSIDE work, in order to make the OUTSIDE work. (i.e. recognise and own your shit, in order to be able to live your best life – whether that’s travelling the globe or doing whatever else that makes you happy and fulfilled).

^ The many faces of a human figuring it all out as she goes

“Back up the truck, Chels! Isn’t this a travel blog?? You’re not gonna go all ‘deep’ on me, are you?”

Well yes, this blog is first and foremost about travel, but there is a reason why it’s called Free Range Kiwi Chick. It’s about living a “free range” LIFE (physically, mentally, emotionally, spiritually). Living “consciously” if you want me to get all woo-woo on you. And travel is a huge part of my journey to living my best life as a conscious, thriving, happy human being (who acknowledges all her quirks and faults!).

So yeah, this is probably my most “deep” and real blog post yet. But bear with me.

The thing is, I believe you can’t be successful, thriving human being who can move forward and invite MORE awesome things into their life, without recognizing, owning and dealing with your own, well, CRAP first. i.e. the blockages, issues, or deep-down beliefs (that may have been there since you were a child). They could be fairly minor in the grand scheme of things, or they could be pretty major. But we ALL have this sort of shit hidden away inside of us that affects our everyday lives. #HumanAF

And after a bit of recent self-reflection, I have decided to come clean about my own crap, and how owning it and working on CLEARING it (or at least recognising when it pops up in my life and dealing with it), will lead to a more happy, thriving even MORE awesome Free Range Kiwi Chick life (full of more travel!! 😉)

So after some recent “a-ha!” moments, I’ve discovered FOUR core goings-on in my life that were popping up and thus not allowing me to move forward with living a successful, happier, more thriving life – both personally and in business.

And hopefully by reading my reflections/findings, you may have some “a-ha!” moments of your own. Yay for self-reflection and sharing the love and all that good warm-fuzzy stuff!

Here we go, strap yourself in:

Blockages in Business

Many of you will know that this year I started my own business working/freelancing as a social media manager. Woohoo! (It’s going well, btw). But things REALLY started moving forward after I discovered a few key things…

I was energetically blocking every time someone contacted me or showed an interest in my services. I was freezing up, and all of a sudden not feeling as confident anymore in what I could provide. (Fuck you, imposter syndrome!)

Like any human who has doubts and questions their abilities, I was afraid that, well, I was just not good enough.

Therefore, what was going on in the inside was affecting the outside reality: I would have proposals rejected.

Urgh, self-sabotage is real guys. #HumanAF.

But remember that this “Inner Critic” is NOT speaking the truth.

The truth is that you’re a badass human being who is REALLY F*CKING GOOD at what you do.  You are talented, intelligent, experienced and most of all worthy of all the good stuff in business (and in life). And you deserve to be paid what you’re worth, too. #boom

So fast forward a bit with newfound mentality in place, I’m now enjoying some nice “wins” and I’ve signed on new clients (with more leads in the pipeline!). People are starting to come to me (rather than me approach them), people are subscribing to my email list, I confidently walk and talk in networking situations, and the $$ is tasting sweeter. It’s important to celebrate these wins (and look how far you’ve come!).

Blockages in Dating/Relationships

Okay now I’m getting really vulnerable. I won’t go into as much detail here, as I’ve got to leave some things private! But what I will touch on is that over recent months, I’ve realised that I have been energetically blocking people in my dating life, too. Oops.

I mean yes, I’m a “strong independent woman who don’t need no man”. I’ve always been comfortable in my own skin and happy whenever I’ve been single. But woah – just when I thought (around the start of 2018) that I was open and ready to meet someone new, I’ve been SUPER back-off-ish when it comes to dating.

Like, I will go on dates, but I would put up MASSIVE walls. When things were actually starting to look really good / go really well… I’d sort of self-sabotage there, too. Focus on all the reasons why it was a bad idea 🙁

“Sorry, this ain’t gonna work at all, see ya!”

*disappears in a puff of smoke*

Why? Simply because I’m really scared of being hurt (again). #HumanAF

Sure, lessons learned from past relationships are a good thing, but from now on I pledge to be as OPEN as possible…. and to not let past relationships rule or set expectations for what happens in the present or future.

Dealing with the G word… GUILT

I’ve always been the girl who does it all. Not to toot my horn too much, but I’ve always been bit of an over-achiever since I was a little kid at primary school. I want to do EVERYTHAAANG – but also be good at it, as well.

• I want to travel the world and keep writing for / building up my travel blog.
• I want to build a thriving business as a Social Media Manager – ultimately being able to travel whenever I want (dat “laptop lifestyle” yo).
• I’ve always loved acting, so I want to continue to be putting in all the love and effort I need into that, in order to create and attract paid work for myself.
• I want to keep traveling regularly (for the rest of my life, probs), but I also REALLY want to buy my own home (realistically, a unit or apartment in this expensive Auckland market…) and my goal is to do this around the middle-end of 2019. So, I need to keep saving up my deposit until then.

But I have felt major guilt for wanting to do it all – as I’ve consequently not been able to put the sufficient amount of time, love and effort into each and every pursuit.

How can I save for a house if I spend thousands of dollars on travel? How can I be a “true” or serious actor if I take a break from my (amazing) acting class… and then not go back to it after 6 months (when I initially planned to)? How can I be a freelance Social Media Manager if I’m not even bothering to grow my travel blog’s Instagram account followers, lol?

Our mate, Miss Inner Critic, really likes to bring along her partner in crime Guilt, doesn’t she?? 😉

The thing is, after toying with the thoughts of giving SOMETHING up, I’ve realised nothing is going to stop me from pursing ANY of these avenues/dreams/goals/projects. I love them too much. These are part of who I am, and what I want in life. So at this point, the solution is “go hard or go home”.

If it’s meant to be, it’s up to me! (hence why I’m writing this blog post late on a Friday night and not out partying/socialising like a normal person). #hustlemode

Success, Reflection & Gratitude

In the past 12+ months I’ve done 3 big trips, travelled to I don’t know how many countries, seen incredible things, met incredible people, and been ripped outside my comfort zone. I’ve taken the leap from the full-time job life to part-time job life (and I’m actually happy in this part-time job… for once) and I’ve started my own business. I’ve started this blog and readership numbers are growing each and every month. I’ve also got a roof over my head, food at my fingertips, supportive friends and family… and wine in the fridge.

I’m in the planning stages of my next overseas trip and the world is my oyster.

If this isn’t a success, what is??

So most of all, I vow to practise more GRATITUDE. I am going to be more present in the NOW, rather than thinking of success and happiness as something that is “just over the hill”. Ya know, once you get to THAT next stage. Once you sign on THIS many clients. Once you have THIS much money coming in. Once I buy a damn house.

It’s about just being present and enjoying the moment. And recognising the #HumanAF crap that comes with being a, well, human. But not letting that affect my next moves, pursuits, goals, or general happiness. #boom

Phew!

If you’ve got the end of this mammoth blog post, congrats! And thanks for sticking it out – you’re the real MVP.

So, what’s next from here?

Well I’ve noticed that the readership of this blog has grown quite a bit in recent months, so I’ve decided to put MORE time, effort and love into it (hooray! ) I’ve been prioritizing my freelancing work (I mean, that’s where the money is right now) but now I want to put more, if not equal, love into Free Range Kiwi Chick.

We’re just getting started, yo.

But for now, I want to say thanks for reading til the end! You’re awesome 😉 Recognize and OWN your crap/blockages/issues, do “the work”, and don’t let them (or the naysayers, or the Inner Critic) stop you from pursuing your goals, passions and desires!

Don’t get me wrong, it’s a CONSTANT process (for as long as you’re alive, probs), but it’s a necessary process to help get you to that next level of, well, life.

Do the inside work to help make the outside work, peeps.

Peace out x